


Sauce for the Goose

by imaginary_golux



Series: Fractured Fairy Tales [9]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fairy Tale, Canon-Typical Violence, Character Death, F/M, Fairy Tale - The Goose Girl, M/M, No Animal Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-26
Updated: 2016-09-26
Packaged: 2018-08-17 11:58:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8142994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginary_golux/pseuds/imaginary_golux
Summary: In which Poe is a beautiful princess, Finn is a handsome prince, Rey is the girl who usually watches the geese, and BB-8 is a talking horse. And Hux is the evil servant.
Beta by my Best Beloved, Turn_of_the_Sonic_Screw.





	

Once upon a time, in a far-off land called Yavin, there was a young prince who was as beautiful as a summer evening, and as well-beloved. He was as kind as he was lovely, and as clever as he was kind, and so he was the treasure of his father’s years and his mother’s heart; and his name was Poe.

Now it came to pass when the prince was old enough to wed that his father besought him a proper marriage, and in time the old king decided upon the prince of the land of Skellig, who was known to be as beautiful as the night sky spangled with stars, and as brave as he was beautiful, and as kind as he was brave; such a man, the king knew, would be a proper mate to his beloved son. So it was set and decided, and young prince Poe made ready to depart; and as he did not wish to appear proud, he bade his father send with him only a single manservant, and his father agreed.

Thus it was that prince Poe and his servant, a very clever fellow named Hux with hair as bright as fire, set out for the kingdom of Skellig together; and the only other companion the prince had was his horse, who was of the blood of the mare of the North Wind, and could speak. This horse was very wise and very devoted to his master, and Poe called him Beebee, and doted upon him.

After a while the little party came to a burbling stream, and Poe said to his manservant, “If you please, would you bring me a cup of water from that stream?”

But his servant sneered at him and replied, “Certainly I will not; you may get down and drink like an animal, for all me.”

At this the prince was very taken aback, for his servant had never spoken to him so before - indeed, in all his life no one had ever spoken so cruelly to him, for he was well beloved - but not wishing to fight, he dismounted from his horse and knelt beside the stream and drank from his cupped hands, and they went on.

The next day they came to another stream, and thinking that perhaps his servant had been having a bad day, Poe asked, “If you please, would you bring me a cup of water from that stream?”

But the servant laughed, and said, “Indeed I will not; you may kneel down in the dirt and drink, if you are so thirsty as all that.”

And again Poe was so startled that he did not object, but got down from his horse and knelt beside the stream and drank from his cupped hands; but when he arose he found that the false servant was holding a sword to threaten him. And the false servant said, “Never again shall I serve you, for I shall be the prince and you the servant; take off your fine clothes and give them to me, and you shall ride my nag and I your fine stallion, and when we reach Skellig I shall marry the prince; and if you speak a word against me, now or ever, I shall slay your stallion before your eyes, for I know you love it well, and then I shall slay you. Therefore swear to keep silence.”

So Poe swore, and exchanged his fine clothing for his servant’s plainer stuff, and mounted his servant’s horse (which was not a nag, for there were no unfit horses in Poe’s father’s stables), and Poe’s Beebee suffered himself to allow Hux onto his back, out of love of Poe. So they went on in that manner until they reached the kingdom of Skellig.

Now the king in that land was named Luke, and was known for his wisdom, and for the wisdom of his sister, Leia, who was co-ruler beside him; and his son was named Finn, and was known in every kingdom near that land as being the kindest and gentlest and bravest man imaginable. And they came down and greeted the false servant eagerly, and bid him come with them to a great feast which had been arranged, and Hux made pretense to be a true prince, and flattered them as well as he might, and was made welcome.

When the feast was over, King Luke and his son asked Hux if there was anything he desired of them, and he said to them, “My horse is a fine handsome fellow, but very ill-tempered; I would ask that you put him in his own stall, far away from any other, and let no one near him lest he injure them.” And so of course the king and his son agreed to that. And then Hux said, “As for my servant, he has served me very ill, and I never wish to see him again; have you some menial labor you could put him to, as that is all he is fit for?” And this, too, was agreed.

So the next day the true prince was informed that he would be tending the geese beside a young lady who called herself Rey, and they went out of the palace together with the flock. And as they passed the last and most isolated stable, Poe’s faithful Beebee put his head over the stall’s door and said to them, “Oh, my prince, how would your parents grieve to know this!”

And Poe said to him, “Yet they must not know, for your life is dearer to me than my own,” and went on out into the meadow.

Now during his hours in the meadow he proved himself so charming, and so well-spoken, and was so willing to sing or tell tales to entertain his companion, that Rey began to think of him as her bosom friend immediately, and begged him to tell her what the meaning of his conversation with his horse had been. But Poe replied that he could not tell any living soul, and she must perforce be content with that.

And so many days passed, as the court of Skellig prepared for the great wedding celebration. And each day Poe and Rey herded the geese out to the meadow, and as they passed the stables, Beebee would hang his head over the stall and say, “Oh, my prince, how would your parents grieve to know this!”

And each day Poe would reply, “Yet they must not know, for your life is dearer to me than my own.” And never would he tell Rey anything of the meaning behind this exchange, though she begged most heartily. But in all other ways he became her dearest friend, and she his, and they rejoiced in each other’s company, and there was no disagreement between them.

Now as it happened, the truth of the matter was that Rey was a princess herself, the daughter of the king, but she had never wished to take the throne, and had begged him for many years to let her shuck off her royal robes and live at peace without the stresses of the court; and when, at last, King Luke had found a young man so wise and kind and brave and gentle as to be the very model of a good and proper king, he had adopted the man and had let his daughter run free. Yet always he and his new son respected her wisdom and her clarity of thought, and often she would bring them news from the common folk which they in their tall palace never heard.

So it was that after some weeks of keeping company with Poe, she went one night to her father and his son, and said to them, “Surely there is some mystery about my companion Poe, whose horse weeps for his misfortune; and indeed I have heard it said that the prince who has come to marry Finn is not as he has always been portrayed, but is cruel and curt where the prince of Yavin is kind and speaks fair, and I suspect some foul plot. Yet Poe will not tell me of his grief; perhaps he will tell you.”

“I will come and ask,” said the young prince, smiling at her with great affection, and the next day he disguised himself as a common soldier, which he once had been, and made his way to the meadow where the geese were kept. There Rey made him welcome, telling Poe he was her oldest friend, and Poe greeted him with great courtesy and amity, and spoke with him so fair and so sweet, that soon they were all friends together.

So it was that the three of them spent days in each other’s company, and found great joy in it; but ever and ever Poe’s horse would lament his fate, until finally Finn asked him to tell them his grief. And Poe replied, “I have sworn never to tell a living soul, and I cannot break my oath.”

Then Finn said, “Oh, then do not tell us, but such a secret must be heavy on your heart - we will go a little ways away, and do you unburden yourself to yonder stone, which is no living soul.” And Poe agreed.

So Finn and Rey went a little ways away, and concealed themselves behind a stand of bushes, where they could hear everything; and Poe sat down beside the stone and lamented that his place and position had been stolen by his false servant, who would marry the prince of Skellig in Poe’s place, and that Poe’s parents should never know what had become of him, and that Hux should doubtless be a cruel and capricious king, unfit for such a wise and gentle partner as the prince of Skellig was said to be.

Then Finn and Rey came out from behind their stand of trees, and raised Poe to his feet and kissed his cheeks, and brought him hotfoot to the king and told him all that they had heard. And wise King Luke listened well, and saw easily the truth of what Poe had said to the stone, for that the false servant Hux was in no wise the sort of man that the king had been told that Yavin’s prince would be. So Poe was dressed in royal garments, and his faithful horse brought from the distant stable to a fine pasture where he could run free, and all was set in readiness for the truth to be revealed.

That night at dinner, Poe was seated at Finn’s left hand, as Hux sat at Finn’s right, and Rey sat beside Poe; and Hux did not recognize his former master, for Poe was so transformed by hope and love. And as the dinner went on, Finn laid a question before Hux, what should be done to a servant who had betrayed his master in such a way as to cause his master’s ruin and great harm? And Hux replied that such a servant should be stripped stark naked and placed in a barrel studded with nails, and the barrel drawn through the streets by a team of horses, until the traitor servant was dead.

Then Finn said, “It is not the way of Skellig to condemn even our foulest criminals to death, but as it is your own judgment you can hardly make complaint; therefore that will be your fate, for you have betrayed your master and done him great harm.” And so the false servant was taken away and all was done just as he had described, save only that instead of a team of horses the barrel was given to Poe’s faithful Beebee to draw through the streets, and Beebee did so with great and vindictive pleasure, until the man who had harmed his master was quite dead.

And then indeed there was a wedding, of the prince of Yavin and the prince and princess of Skellig, for neither would step aside in favor of the other: Finn proclaimed that Poe was his betrothed husband, and he would in no wise give him over, while Rey declared that she had loved him first, and would in no way be put aside, until at last Poe took them both to be his husband and his wife, and there was peace and love between all three of them, and they ruled the kingdom of Skellig wisely and well for many years. And for all I know they are ruling there still.

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't bear to kill BB-8, although the horse in the original gets killed pretty early on. But the thing with the barrel is true to the fairy tale.
> 
> I tumbl as imaginarygolux - drop on by!


End file.
